When once I was blind, now I see...

Have you ever closed your eyes and tried to navigate your way around your house?
What about closing one eye and then squinting with the other and trying to complete a task with your non-dominant hand?

We found out just over a week ago that Ryley has virtually no eyesight.
We knew he was blind in his right eye, but have always assumed that the sight in his left eye was ok. We knew it wasn't wonderful, but we still thought it was pretty good.
Wrong.

How can you miss the fact that your son can't see?
How can you not notice the difficulties he is having with walking are more to do with the fact he can't see where he is going?
How can you not notice that when he cries, it is because he can't see you, and is frightened?

Well, somehow, I missed the fact that he is basically blind.
Another fine example of my parenting skills.

*Sigh*

So Ryley now has glasses which he is starting to realise he needs to keep on.
He is amazed at how different life looks and this is a wonderful thing (heartbreaking though to think he may have been unable to see for a long time).
Here he is watching TV and actually able to see what is going on. About 50% of the time he is keeping his glasses on so far.

The other 50% of the time he looks like this:

But we know it will take a bit for him to adjust to having glasses. His world has been completely thrown upside down.
Everything he knew before has changed, and it will take some getting used to.

I guess you can only try and focus on what is positive from all of this.
And that is, at least we have found out now before his eyesight deteriorated so much that nothing would help him.
Things I have learnt from this:
I really need to find more time to fit appointments in.
I really need to find time to make appointments and follow up on things.
I really need more time.

I am excited for Ryley as the world opens up to him again.
I remember feeling excited for him when we started the Ketogenic Diet too, as it meant giving him another chance to enjoy life.

So so proud of him.

(And extremely proud of Braeden who has been encouraging him to wear his glasses, catching them as they get tossed away and cleaning them constantly with the little yellow cloth).





Comments

  1. Anna - don't we all wish we had more time to do things. You are the mum that does what she has to to get the job done. You do not have bad parenting skills AT ALL.. You have two gorgeous boys that adore you. So you missed something but you probably had a hundred other things that needed your attention. Please don't beat yourself up about it - your diary now just has to include reminders that you have appts coming up and don't forget to include nice comments about yourself.

    Michelle

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    Replies
    1. Thanks Michelle. It just cuts right to the very core of my being when I realise that I have missed something with Ryley (or Braeden for that matter). At least he now has his glasses and hopefully he will be able to experience lots more things now he can see xox

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  2. Stop beating yourself up Anna. You and David are wonderful parents and Braeden is a wonderful brother.. .. Ryley tricked us all by pretending he could see ;))

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  3. Oh Anna.... you are not at all at fault here. Dont be so hard on yourself. You are a bloody awesome parent, and having a non verbal child who cant tell you what is going on and what they are feeling is bloody hard. Its a constant guessing game...!! As you said just be glad that you found out now whilst you can still do something about it.

    P.s I think he looks pretty handsome with his new glasses

    Big hugs to you all xx

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  4. It is oh so hard when our kids cannot tell us what they need. You must be happy that a problem has been identified and helped. Looks great in his new glasses and he is so lucky to have an attending brother. You are doing a great job!!

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  5. Anna, you are a fabulous parent, one I look up to and regard in the highest fashion. I was just talking to a friend the other day about how hard it is to always guess what is going on. We (as moms) do not often give ourselves credit for our correct guesses, however we are quick to blame ourselves for the incorrect ones. We should not do that. Sending love your way!

    Ryley looks very handsome in his glasses.

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  6. Susan, Mum to MollyApril 16, 2012 at 9:25 PM

    Would it be helpful/useful for Braeden to have a pair too? With either no or clear lenses...

    My youngest went through a stage of wearing a pair of 'glasses' (crappy party sunnies with the lenses taken out), so she could be like her big sister. Might help Ryley keep his on too...?

    Just a thought. And agree with the others - don't be so hard on yourself, and yes Ryley looks very distinguished!

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